Running scared...

It's well and truly hit the fan this time. What am I talking about? Only the fact that my other half wants me to go up to Yorkshire, and meet his parents.

Ok - under normal circustances, I could cope with that, but I'm somewhat more suspicious... Simply because over the past month or so, he's been on about me moving in with him, and putting our relationship on a more formal footing than it is at the moment.

The trouble is, I know damned well that I enjoy my freedom too much to consider moving in with him. It's not that I don't love him - I do - it's just that the current arrangement suits me fine, as I can do my own thing without having to justify what I'm up to, and where I'm going.

I know for a fact that he doesn't like me getting up at "the crack of sparrow fart" as he so eloquently refers to my alarm call at 04:30 in the summer, and 05:30 in winter, to go and tend to Flame and escape for an early morning ride.

Equally, I know that if I try to tell him that I'm happy with the way things are, he'll start to worry that I'm trying to wriggle out of the relationship, which I'm not.

But having said that, I've been through the hell of having a partner who wanted me to give up my horse, and once gave me an ultimatum - him or the horse. I chose the horse, and it was the best thing that I ever did, as I was able to walk away and find someone who means the world to me.

My trouble is, I need my freedom, and most fellas I've dated have had a hard job accepting that fact, and I've lost count of the number of rows that it's caused between myself the the guy I was seeing. In fact, I can only think of one fella who was comfortable with that idea - and we ended up as best mates!

Time to call this blog entry quits - I want to get some bits and pieces sorted out around the house, and get myself metally prepared for the inevitable fireworks when I tell my other half how I'm feeling....

Karen.


I walk where others fear to tread