A Christmas display, and more plants.

Not something that I usually like to admit... But this display at Melbicks Garden Centre really caught my eye...

Unusually for me, I really liked the displays.  They weren't the usual artificial trees loaded with decorations that they were trying to sell - although they were there.

And yes - as usual, I "rescued" two more carnivorous plants - Sarracenia hybrids.  The best bit (for me) was the fact that they were reduced - as in well under half price, and had a reasonable chance of survival.

So, I have now placed them in a tray of rainwater in their usual winter quarters (an unheated greenhouse) so that I can acclimatise them to "normal" growing conditions ready for planting outside in the spring.  Then they can munch the local insect population to their heart's (and pitchers) content....

Ah well, I need to make sure that the rest of the monsters are ok - winter is coming and I need to ensure that they are protected enough to go through the colder months ready for spring.

Back later...

Karen

See the night sky super nova
Chase the cold moon passing over
Start the dragon's fire to smoulder
On a storyteller's night

Christmas baking

Well, as it's Christmas, I decided to make peppermint creams...  The traditional plain ones, and ones rolled in grated Bournville chocolate:

I was also asked to make a Reindeer gingerbread cake / biscuit:

This was before I decorated it - like an idiot, I forgot to take photos...  But hopefully the recipient will enjoy it...

Guess I'd better call this quits - dinner's nearly ready...

Back when I get chance....

Karen

Your dreams, won’t die

If you remember them each day

Sweet dreams, blue sky

They’re gonna take you all the way

I believe, in you, no lie

Your dreams, won’t die

Your dreams won’t die

Finalising Christmas presents and other rants

What is it about Christmas that makes people rush around like maniacs, buying more food and booze than they normally buy, and buy complete tasteless tat for Christmas presents?

I only mention this, because me being dumb realised that I’d not bought my Secret Santa present. So, I nipped into the local Sainsbury’s, to get the required gift. And what sights I saw.

More food and booze being bought than enough – I got the feeling that people are taking the three days off between Christmas and New Year, and will be just sitting in their armchairs feeding their faces with junk food and booze.

Why do I say this? Simple. Most of the stuff that I saw being loaded into trolleys was junk food – biscuits, crisps, etc as well as cases of booze. I could understand people stocking up, if they had family coming over, but surely they would have bought things like milk, bread, fruit and vegetables?

Maybe that’s just me being old fashioned, but it’s one of the things that I really dislike about Christmas. Mind you, I’ve got the perfect hat – it’s black and white, in the shape of a Santa hat, and says “BAH HUMBUG”

So, as you’ve guessed it, I'm really in the Christmas spirit. Not. But, I guess this will change on Boxing Day,as I'm going to see my Godsprog and her family. The only request (or should that be order) that the little monster has made is to my Mum – she’s asked Mum if she can make her a fresh Raspberry flan. Amber has been really generous as well – she said that she may even share it with Mum – greedy little monster.

But aside from that, I’ve now sorted my Secret Santa gift – it’s now on the desk with the rest of the stuff that people have bought – I'm dreading finding out what mine is….

Back later, if I get the chance.

If not – MERRY CHRISTMAS TO YOU ALL

Karen

Now some things you hold on to - and some you just let go
Seems like the ones that you can't have
Are the ones that you want most

London gets snow, and the whole world panics

As you can tell, I’m not exactly a fan of London. There are other parts of the UK that get snow every year, but there is very little fuss made. One flake of snow hits London, and the media goes into meltdown (forgive the pun).

It wouldn’t be so bad if the same criteria was applied to other areas, but no. It’s almost as if other parts of the country don’t matter.

Aside from that particular grump, I’ve had the last two days of my holiday. I’m not saying that I am now all sorted, and ready for Christmas – (Bah Humbug!) but it could be an awful lot worse – I could still have presents to get. Ok – I’ve got one left – my secret Santa gift.

This annual ritual of torment isn’t too bad for me this year, as the person I’ve got to buy for is relatively easy (and I’ve avoided getting the department bitch – don’t think she’d have appreciated the large clockwork key or a sugar dummy!)

Ah well, guess I should get some work done, but I’m suffering from TNFI…

Back later.

Karen

Now some things you hold on to - and some you just let go
Seems like the ones that you can't have
Are the ones that you want most

A turkey's idea of Christmas?

Merry Christmas to one and all

Karen

Learning to fly, but I don't have wings

Chilling out before Christmas

There's something magical about seeing someone you love just before Christmas - and that's what I've been lucky enough to do this weekend.

I’d arranged to meet my beloved at the Green Man pub / restaurant, with the idea being that it was a weekend for the pair of us to kick back, shut out the world and spend some time together – with no-one demanding that we pay attention to them.

All I will say is that I’m nicely chilled out, and am ready to face the madness that is Christmas, and that nothing will be able to rattle my confidence.

Time to call this quits – I’ve still got a few bits and pieces to sort out…

Karen
Learning to fly, but I don’t have wings

Something to sum up Christmas....

Occasionally, you come across a real gem - and I think this is one!

Enjoy.

Karen

Learning to fly, but I don't have wings

*************************************************

A Christmas Story

'Twas the night before Christmas - old Santa was pissed.
He cussed out the elves and threw down his list.
Miserable little brats, ungrateful little jerks.
I have a good mind to scrap the whole works!

I've busted my ass for damn near a year,
Instead of "Thanks Santa" - what do I hear?
The old lady bitches 'cause I work late at night.
The elves want more money - the reindeer all fight.
Rudolph got drunk and goosed all the maids.
Donner is pregnant and Vixen has AIDS.

And just when I thought that things would get better
Those assholes from the IRS sent me a letter,
They say I owe taxes - if that ain't funny
Who the hell ever sent Santa Claus any money?

And the kids these days - they all are the pits
They want the impossible - those mean little shits
I spent a whole year making wagons and sleds
Assembling dolls - their arms, legs, and heads
I made a ton of yo yo's - no request for them,
They want computers and robots...they think I'm IBM!

Flying through the air...dodging the trees
Falling down chimneys and skinning my knees
I'm quitting this job there's just no enjoyment
I'll sit on my fat ass and draw unemployment.
There's no Christmas this year now you know the reason,
I found me a blonde - I'm going SOUTH for the season.

T'was the night before Christmas....

Well, it's nearly the big day, and I've finally got everything sorted out, and wrapped up... Mum was at work, so it meant that I was able to get her presents wrapped up, and hidden without her knowing what I've bought her.. No doubt I'll get skinned for the perfume bottle, but that's something that I can live with...

I went into Leamington this morning, expecting to be fighting the hoards, only to find that the centre was practically deserted! I got parked without a problem, and headed to my first destination - the bank - I wanted to get some cash out of the ATM, before the hoards took it all!

I then walked across Warwick Street to Boots, as I had an opticians appointment (the only reason I was dumb enough to go out today!) It turns out that I do need to change my glasses, as my sight in the left eye has deteriorated - to the extent that I'm going to be more comfortable with a change of prescription...

But it's nothing that I can't live with at the moment, so I've made the decision to hold off getting a new pair of glasses until the New Year, as Boots have got their sale on, and I really can't be bothered messing around waiting for them to get my glasses sorted out.

I also had a quiet wander around, looking for the last minute bits and pieces, and seeing if there were any good deals going on my favorite perfumes... Unfortunately there weren't, but I can always look after Christmas, when the stores will hopefully be reducing the gift sets, and I can take my pick!

I also spoke to my daft friend, and he was doing his best to make me laugh.. He said that he was going to see if he could get into the kitchen to do some cooking (blimey - wonder if he gives lessons? I can't cook to save my life!), and has said that he's going to put Ainsley Harriot to shame.... He's promised to send the piccys to me, so as soon as I get them, then they'll be aired on my blog...

Suppose I should call this entry quits - I want to get the furry fiends settled early tonight, as there are a couple of good films that I want to watch in peace!

Back when I get the chance.

Karen.

I walk where others fear to tread

PS - Merry Christmas to one and all!!

K.

On the run up to Christmas....

Ok - I admit that I've been somewhat lax about updating my blog recently, as I've had more important things to worry about - namely my god-sprog getting out of hospital - which is a relief for me, as towards the end of her stay, the little rat was trying to throttle me with my chain whenever she got the chance!

Aside from that, there was the preparation required for the annual piss-up that is the departmental Christmas party – this year; it was held at Hall Green Dog racing stadium... How I refrained from making comments about certain (female) members of staff coming out of trap three, I don’t know!*Grin*

Despite that, it was a damned good night out, and I was smart enough to avoid going out clubbing with the rest of them, as I’d already experienced a hangover at work, and didn’t plan on repeating the experience!

There have also been several jokes floating around, and this was one that I thought worthy of posting:

In the Late 1800s a little girl named Virginia asked the New York Times if there was a Santa Clause. The reply is now famous. Someone thought it would be fun to ask the scientists at NASA the same question. Here is their reply:

No known species of reindeer can fly. But there ARE 300,000 species of living organisms yet to be classified, and while most of these are insects and germs, this does not completely rule out flying reindeer, which only Santa has seen.

There are two billion children (under 18) in the world. But since Santa doesn't appear to handle Muslim, Hindu, Buddhist and Jewish children,that reduces the workload to 15% of the total - 138 million or so.

At an average rate of 3.5 children per household, that's 91.8 million homes.One presumes there is at least one good child in each. Santa has 31 hours of Christmas to work with, thanks to time zones and the rotation of the earth, assuming he travels east to west. This works out to 822.6 visits per second.

This is to say that for each household with good children, Santa has 1/1000th of a second to park, hop out of the sleigh, jump down the chimney, fill the stockings, distribute the remaining gifts under the tree, eat snacks, get back up the chimney, get back into the sleigh, and move to the next house.

Assuming that each of these 91.8 million houses are distributed evenly (which we know to be false but for the sake of these calculations we will accept) we are now talking about 0.78 miles per household, a total trip of 75.5 million miles, not counting bathroom stops.

This means that Santa's sleigh is travelling at 650 miles per second, 3,000 times the speed of sound. For comparison, the fastest man made vehicle, the Ulysses space probe moves at a poky 27.4 mps. The average reindeer runs at 15 mph.

The sleigh's payload adds another interesting element. Assuming that each child gets nothing more than a medium sized Lego set (2 lbs), the sleigh is carrying 321,300 TONS, not counting Santa, who is invariably described as overweight.

On land, conventional reindeer can pull no more than 300 lbs. Even granting that "flying reindeer" (see first paragraph) could pull TEN TIMES the usual amount, we cannot do the job with 8 or even 9. We need 214,000 reindeer.

This increases the weight, not even counting the sleigh, to 353,430 tons. Again, for comparison this is 4 times the weight of the British liner QE2.

353,430 tons travelling at 650 miles per second creates an enormous air resistance. This will heat the reindeer in the same manner as a spacecraft re-entering the earth's atmosphere.

The lead pair of reindeer will absorb 14.3 QUINTILLION joules of energy..... Per second..... Each! In short, they will burst in flame almost instantaneously, exposing the next pair of reindeer, and creating deafening sonic booms in their wake. The entire team will be vaporized within 4.26 thousands of a second.

Santa, meanwhile, will be subjected to centrifugal forces 1,750,006 times the force of gravity. A 300 pound Santa would be pinned to the back of his sleigh by 4,325,015 pounds of force.

CONCLUSION: If there was a Santa, he's dead now.

I make no appologies for this - I found it funny....

Time to call it quits - I need to get some sleep tonight, as I've got to go and fight the hoards in Leamington tomorrow morning... I must be barmy!

Back tomorrow - if I'm still in one piece!

Karen.

I walk where others fear to tread

The day after the day before...

Christmas. You seem to spend about half the year preparing for the big day, and when it finally arrives, it's almost as if it's a case of is this it? All that work / stress / hassle for this?

Ok - maybe I'm getting cynical in my old age. (And before I get comments - I know I'm only 30, but there have been times when I've felt 130! The morning after my department's Christmas do being one of them! More on that in a later post.)

Having said that, it wasn't too bad - Mum and I had a quiet day - which is what the pair of us really wanted (apart from Dad being with us - but that just goes without saying, really.)

Mum was over the moon with the perfume bottle, and said that it was from a maker that she'd never considered collecting in the past. The foot spa was well received, and Mum put it to the test later in the day, and said that it made her feet feel a lot better.

Me? I got Green Day's new album - American Idiot. I'm listening to it now, and some of the songs are really though provoking - especially Boulevard of Broken Dreams. I will admit - that's one of my favorite tracks, but the rest of the album has the normal guitar riffs and good strong vocals.

The one present that really made me smile was given to me by a guy that I met (ok re-phrase that - got to know better as a person!) at the Christmas do. He gave me a little box that was gift wrapped, and insisted that I waited until Christmas day to open the box, and then call him to let him know what I thought...

He'd bought me a pair of Peridot earrings! They're really unusual, and to say I was speechless was an understatement! I called him as soon as I could, and said that I was really touched, and felt a real rat, because I hadn't gotten him anything.

The reply was something that took me by surprise - "Princess, you don't need to get me anything. You're the only thing that I want for Christmas." Normally, I'd be making comments along the lines of - "Where's the vomit bucket / what are you after, etc"

Needless to say, after that, I was struggling to find words - not something that I usually have problems with - as my friends well know!

Ah well - time to call the entry quits - I'm off to Leek Wooten to see Amber & co...

Back whenever.

Karen.

Do spiders scream when they see a big fat hairy human in the bath?

Dealing with Christmas cards

Well, I'm just about finished the Christmas cards. I've sent the e-card to my late father's friends in the USA, and all I've got to do now is post the other three cards (yes - I know I've left it late to post them - but some of us have been busy!)

The hardest bit has been putting the letter inside the card, to let people know what has happened. I will admit, the return cards have reduced Mum & myself to tears on more than one occasion.

Suppose I'd better bring this blog up to date a bit... It's just been a case of trying to find the time and place to put this down onto a keyboard - without getting skinned!

I went on the office Christmas do on Wednesday night - good food, good drink and good company - and a minor hangover the following morning!

Despite that, it was a good night out, and I'm not going to say any more than that, as I don't really want to reveal anything. Well, not yet anyway! *Grin*

I've also been promising a friend of mine, White Wolf, that I would publish a poetry website he publishes on... http://www.allpoetry.com/

He's written some good stuff, and hopefully, I'll be able to talk him into starting his own blog - his outlook on life is very refreshing, and frequently has me howling with laughter when we're on the phone.

Time to call it quits - got stuff around the house to do today.

Back when I get time & peace & quiet!

Karen


Do spiders scream when they see a big fat hairy human in the bath?

Getting into the Christmas spirit? I think not.

I'm starting to dread the annual ritual of writing the Christmas cards to people. The family are ok, as they obviously know what's happened, but it's people that we (Mum & I) haven't seen / spoken to since last year that are worrying me.

Why? Because Mum & I are going to have to compose a letter to enclose with the cards, and let people know what has happened - and then wait for the 'phone calls, which I know damned well will upset Mum, as well as me... But I've already had one freak out episode in this so-called season of goodwill already....

I know this will sound crazy, but I had a minor crack up episode on Friday (after I'd posted to my blog.) I wasn't feeling very sociable at lunch-time, and rather than face having to try and make small talk with colleagues over sandwiches / soup and other lunches, I made a choice, that with hindsight, probably wasn't the smartest thing I could have done.

I went to the Crem and "spoke" to Dad. I was ok, until I read one of the Christmas cards that had been left in the Chapel of Remembrance. It was to a Beloved Father, and spoke of how the sender may not have seemed appreciative of his / her father, but that they always knew that they could rely on them when they needed support.

That was it. I burst into tears, and God knows how I managed to drive back to the office. I think that someone must have been looking after me on that drive, and when I got back into the office, my colleagues were concerned, as I looked a wreck.

My mascara had run (I wasn't wearing the waterproof mascara that I'd bought for Dad's funeral - brilliant stuff by Bourjois - it's called Plump up the Volume Waterproof in Brun Solis), and my eyes were all red and puffy.

Thankfully, I was left alone, but I'll say one thing for my colleagues - they all made sure I was ok - including my boss, who was worried about me driving home Friday night.

Admittedly, I wasn't going straight home - as Friday was my Godsprog's birthday, I had to make an appearance. But, I will admit, I was really glad that I did make the effort and go.

The look of delight on Amber's face when she saw the space hopper was something that really made me feel a lot brighter. Not to mention the glee with which she took to the space hopper - and started chasing the family cat!

So, I got home and saw that Mum had left me a note as she was working the late shift... We'd ordered a mower back in September.... Only for the company whom we'd ordered it from to say that they couldn't get the mower, and neither could Mountfield themselves!

So, Mum had the money refunded to her, and the note asked if I could go into Stratford to the mower place on Western Road (Simms) to sort one out - she's already reserved it, and all I needed to do was take the payment into them, and sort out the delivery.

Thanks. I was trying to avoid going out at the weekend, as I've done all my Christmas shopping (smug grin). Ok - I've still got to get one thing - my Secret Santa gift.

For those people (un)lucky enough to avoid this ritual, it basically involves everyone in the office writing their name on a piece of paper, and then someone else drawing it out of the bowl and scampering off to celebrate or drown their sorrows - depending on who they managed to get. But, I digress.

Simms was easy to get to, and get parked. The fun came when I had to pull out of Western Road. Those people who know Stratford-Upon-Avon will know the place that I'm talking about - it's just off the main drag up to the Tesco Superstore.

Which means that the only way to get out onto the main road, is take a chance and push your way out. Or, you could always wait for some kind motorist to let you out.

But, at this time of year, they are few and far between, especially when they've realised that Auntie Mavis is comming for pre-christmas drinks, and will only drink Bristol Cream sherry - which is the one drink that isn't kept in the house!

So, it was a case of speak softly - use airhorns - which had I been driving the Toyota, I would have done. But the Peugeot doesn't do too badly - especially not when the horn is followed with verbal abuse and / or appropriate hand gestures!

Once out onto the Birmingham road (the main drag), I tried to get past the hoards heading to Tesco and the Maybird shopping centre (which has a vaiety of stores from B&Q to Next and Halfords.)

For some reason, the great British motorist seems to take offence when they get the impression that someone might be trying to get ahead of them! They were all turning right - all I wanted to do was go straight on! I lost count of the dirty looks that I got, simply because I seemed to be moving through the traffic faster than I should have done.

Ah well, suppose I'd better log off & bog off - I've got to get the rest of my Christmas cards written...

Bah Humbug!

Back later - if I haven't gotten writer's block!

Karen

Do spiders scream when they see a big fat hairy human in the bath?

Short staffed, and short voiced....

We've got a whole load of people off sick / on holiday today, and I'm losing my voice. Still, guess it could be worse - I could still look like Rudolph the Red Nose Reindeer!


But, having said that, the weekend was quite good, as I managed to get all of my Christmas shopping done - including getting my Godsprog's birthday and Christmas presents. The little munchkin is getting a space hopper for her birthday - that way, she can chase the family cat to her heart's content...


Christmas.... Me being malevolent, I've bought her the cymbal set to match her drum set that her aunt has bought her for Christmas. Her mother is going to skin the pair of us, but I think she may forgive me.... Eventually. *Grin*


Having said that though, I know that Amber will appreciate the pressies - and will take great delight in driving her family barmy!


Mind you, I picked this little gem up from the company newsletter....


A Christmas Story

It was Christmas Eve, and the excitement and anticipation of the night ahead, was so close you could almost taste it. Kitchens all over were infused with the heady scent of mince pies oozing with brandy butter. Children were hanging their stockings on the chimney breast hoping that tomorrow they would be stuffed beyond their wildest dreams (the stockings, not the children!?!).

So what tragic irony that amidst such seasonal goodwill, Father Christmas, the man who shoulders the burden of all our Christmas expectations should be having such a torrid time.

Mrs Christmas wasn't speaking to him as she'd discovered she was getting perfume for the 10th year running. The Elves were complaining that they had not been paid for the overtime they'd put in while making the toys for the world's children.

The reindeer had found a bottle of cherry brandy at the back of the cupboard and had taken the sleigh out for a spin, crashed it into a tree and were now rolling around laughing hysterically and telling silly jokes.

Poor Father Christmas was at the end of his tether. "I CAN'T believe it! I've got to deliver millions of presents all over the world in just a few hours from now and my reindeer are drunk, my elves are on strike, the wife's in a strop and I don't even have a Christmas tree! I sent that silly Little Angel out HOURS ago to find a tree and he still hasn't come back yet!"

Just then the Little Angel, all aglow with heavenly goodness, opened the front door and stepped in from the snowy night, dragging an enormous, lush Christmas tree behind him. The little Angel looked up at Father Christmas with shining eyes and spake forth: "Where would you like me to stick this, Father Christmas???"

And thus it came to pass, in homes the whole world over, the tradition of an Angel perching precariously atop the Family Christmas tree. Sure to bring a tear to even the most unfeeling eye!

Suppose I should think about doing some work, instead of blogging..


Back later - if I get the chance...


Karen.
Do spiders scream when they see a big fat hairy human in the bath?

Weird films and other stuff...

If I didn't know better, I would swear that Dreamcatcher was based on a Stephen King book.(Feedback to let me know if I'm right, or scatching the wrong post would be much appreciated!) Don't get me wrong, I loved every second of the film - and have deemed it another must get for my ever expanding DVD collection!

I will admit, it freaked my friend out, and she sat for the best part of the film, cuddling a cushion, and hiding when some of the worms made their presence known. I won't say anymore, but to those who read Stephen King books, it will come as no surprise the style of the ending...

Onto a slightly touchy subject - Christmas. I always jokingly say "Unh, no-one mention the c-word" - just a slight twist on a line in Beetlejuice! Because Mum is at work this weekend, I made the most of it, and escaped into town (Leamington) and managed to get part of Mum's Christmas present.

She knows that I'm going to get her a Remington Footspa, but this second bit, is unknown to her. I've bought her a perfume bottle. Ok - I know that doesn't sound much, but I'd better explain a bit more.

Mum and Dad used to collect what is commonly known as Studio Glass - i.e. the stuff that is still blown by hand. Good examples are Okra (it used to be part of the Moorcroft pottery group) and John Ditchfield (he of the wonderful glass lilly pad paperweight - complete with the little silver frog!)

This perfume bottle is made by an English glass-making company, in the Lake District - Heron Glass. It's all iridecent blues, greens and golds, and it's just the sort of thing that Mum would go for. The best bit is, the fact that I've been able to hide the bottle in the study - as it's one of the two rooms that she won't willingly venture into - the other one being my room, as she's never sure where the cats are hiding!

Time to call it quits - I can see the moggies giving me the evil eye again, as they're not getting any attention from me, and Ponto looks like he's going to eat the computer mouse if I don't sign off!

Back tomorrow - I hope!

Karen.

Do spiders scream when they see a big fat hairy human in the bath?