Walking in the Shadows

Random musings from Warwickshire on life in general... Things that make me laugh, make me cry, things that wind me up beyond all endurance - and everything in between.

Showing posts with label Social. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Social. Show all posts

Bowling…

Well, the bowling was good fun, and I admit, I can’t bowl to save my life. Or that was until I was given an idea…

One of my colleagues suggested that I visualised the pins as the person I most hated, and then just let the ball do the damage. Well, put it like this – it worked – to the extent that my colleagues were speculating as to who I was aiming at!

I won’t reveal who I was aiming at, but the technique seemed to work for me - until I got to the point where I realised that I’d gotten rid of all the hatred / anger / frustration that had been working for me…. Damn.

But, it was a good night out, and I guess I should call this quits – I'm back in the playpen tomorrow.

Back tomorrow.

Karen


Now some things you hold on to - and some you just let go
Seems like the ones that you can't have
Are the ones that you want most

The Annual Christmas Do is no more (for this year anyway!)

Oh dear. It looks like the Christmas piss up (I mean departmental dinner) is cancelled for this year, due to a lack of interest. Hardly surprising, when you consider that it was to be help on December 18 (the last Friday before Christmas). I mean, what bright spark came up with that date?

It wouldn’t have been so bad if they’d decided to hold it earlier (like about December 11) but the police will be out in force, and breathalysing people for the slightest driving infringement. Not that I object in the slightest, as I despise people who drink and drive (if I’m honest, I’m amazed that certain people I work with have never been done!)

But what really gets to me, is the mere fact that just because I work with people, I am expected to socialise with them. That’s just the problem. Aside from working with them, I have nothing in common with them.

My interests are totally different, I loathe the soaps and stupid “reality” shows like I’m a celebrity, and am quite happy curling up in the evening with a mug of hot chocolate and a book. Yes, I go out, but I go out with people who are good friends and I have a lot in common with, and more to the point, am willing to spend time with. Most of the people I work with, I would have nothing to do with outside of the office.

But trying to explain that to people without offending them is not the easiest thing in the world, so I just don’t both, and am quite happy to let them think what they like – namely that I am antisocial. I am – where they are concerned. The people who know me, know differently.

Guess I should call this quits – I’m supposed to be working.

Back later…


Karen

Now some things you hold on to - and some you just let go
Seems like the ones that you can't have
Are the ones that you want most

Tears, frustration and irritation

Today has not been a good day for me. It started off when I had a row with one of the girls in the office, as I refused to go to the quiz night next month. Why? Simply because it will be two years to the date that my Dad died – and I have FAR more important things to do, other than watching the members of my department making complete fools of themselves with their lack of knowledge on world events.

To compound a rotten day in the office you can add into the equation the mere fact that I’m still in pain because of my trip to the chiropractor (who’s still trying to finish putting my vertebrae back into their correct positions), and you get an unhappy tigger.

The final straw that broke the tigger’s back was when the alarm went off for no apparent reason. Which is why I’m sitting at my computer at 00:23 updating my blog – thank god I’m off today, otherwise I would be completely wiped out.

Mum knows that I’m off in the afternoon, but she doesn’t know that I’ve booked the morning off so that I can go and get her birthday present – and I haven’t got the foggiest idea what to get her!

Time to call this quits – I need to get some sleep if I can…

Back when I get the chance.

Karen

Learning to fly, but I don't have wings

On the run up to Christmas....

Ok - I admit that I've been somewhat lax about updating my blog recently, as I've had more important things to worry about - namely my god-sprog getting out of hospital - which is a relief for me, as towards the end of her stay, the little rat was trying to throttle me with my chain whenever she got the chance!

Aside from that, there was the preparation required for the annual piss-up that is the departmental Christmas party – this year; it was held at Hall Green Dog racing stadium... How I refrained from making comments about certain (female) members of staff coming out of trap three, I don’t know!*Grin*

Despite that, it was a damned good night out, and I was smart enough to avoid going out clubbing with the rest of them, as I’d already experienced a hangover at work, and didn’t plan on repeating the experience!

There have also been several jokes floating around, and this was one that I thought worthy of posting:

In the Late 1800s a little girl named Virginia asked the New York Times if there was a Santa Clause. The reply is now famous. Someone thought it would be fun to ask the scientists at NASA the same question. Here is their reply:

No known species of reindeer can fly. But there ARE 300,000 species of living organisms yet to be classified, and while most of these are insects and germs, this does not completely rule out flying reindeer, which only Santa has seen.

There are two billion children (under 18) in the world. But since Santa doesn't appear to handle Muslim, Hindu, Buddhist and Jewish children,that reduces the workload to 15% of the total - 138 million or so.

At an average rate of 3.5 children per household, that's 91.8 million homes.One presumes there is at least one good child in each. Santa has 31 hours of Christmas to work with, thanks to time zones and the rotation of the earth, assuming he travels east to west. This works out to 822.6 visits per second.

This is to say that for each household with good children, Santa has 1/1000th of a second to park, hop out of the sleigh, jump down the chimney, fill the stockings, distribute the remaining gifts under the tree, eat snacks, get back up the chimney, get back into the sleigh, and move to the next house.

Assuming that each of these 91.8 million houses are distributed evenly (which we know to be false but for the sake of these calculations we will accept) we are now talking about 0.78 miles per household, a total trip of 75.5 million miles, not counting bathroom stops.

This means that Santa's sleigh is travelling at 650 miles per second, 3,000 times the speed of sound. For comparison, the fastest man made vehicle, the Ulysses space probe moves at a poky 27.4 mps. The average reindeer runs at 15 mph.

The sleigh's payload adds another interesting element. Assuming that each child gets nothing more than a medium sized Lego set (2 lbs), the sleigh is carrying 321,300 TONS, not counting Santa, who is invariably described as overweight.

On land, conventional reindeer can pull no more than 300 lbs. Even granting that "flying reindeer" (see first paragraph) could pull TEN TIMES the usual amount, we cannot do the job with 8 or even 9. We need 214,000 reindeer.

This increases the weight, not even counting the sleigh, to 353,430 tons. Again, for comparison this is 4 times the weight of the British liner QE2.

353,430 tons travelling at 650 miles per second creates an enormous air resistance. This will heat the reindeer in the same manner as a spacecraft re-entering the earth's atmosphere.

The lead pair of reindeer will absorb 14.3 QUINTILLION joules of energy..... Per second..... Each! In short, they will burst in flame almost instantaneously, exposing the next pair of reindeer, and creating deafening sonic booms in their wake. The entire team will be vaporized within 4.26 thousands of a second.

Santa, meanwhile, will be subjected to centrifugal forces 1,750,006 times the force of gravity. A 300 pound Santa would be pinned to the back of his sleigh by 4,325,015 pounds of force.

CONCLUSION: If there was a Santa, he's dead now.

I make no appologies for this - I found it funny....

Time to call it quits - I need to get some sleep tonight, as I've got to go and fight the hoards in Leamington tomorrow morning... I must be barmy!

Back tomorrow - if I'm still in one piece!

Karen.

I walk where others fear to tread